Im A Big Girl In A Big World

I'm a big big girl 

In a big big world 

It's not a big big thing if you leave me 

But I do do feel that 

I do do will miss you much 

Miss you much... 

I can see the first leaf falling 

It's all yellow and nice 

It's so very cold outside 

Like the way I'm feeling inside 

I'm a big big girl 

In a big big world 

It's not a big big thing if you leave me 

But I do do feel that 

I do do will miss you much 

Miss you much... 

Outside it's now raining 

And tears are falling from my eyes 

Why did it have to happen 

Why did it all have to end 

I'm a big big girl 

In a big big world 

It's not a big big thing if you leave me 

But I do do feel that 

I do do will miss you much 

Miss you much... 

I have your arms around me ooooh like fire 

But when I open my eyes 

You're gone... 

I'm a big big girl 

In a big big world 

It's not a big big thing if you leave me 

But I do do feel that 

I do do will miss you much 

Miss you much... 

I'm a big big girl 

In a big big world 

It's not a big big thing if you leave me 

But I do feel I will miss you much 

Miss you much...

This post I dedicate to all the people or things that have gone left me 

Unspoken Thanks

Indahnya dunia tak diragukan.
Fikir melayang kadang terlewatkan.
Hidup memang tak pernah manis.
Selalu saja tak sejalan tak ayal sadis.
Walau kejam tapi tak akan sirna.
Jika belum waktunya.

Berani sekali bibir ini mengeluh?
Apa aku sudah melakukan semuanya dengan benar?

Coba hitung berapa tawa yang kau perdengarkan pada semesta?
Rekam semua keluh kesah yang kau derita.
Apakah kau sudah mengucap syukur sebelumnya?

Untuk diriku, aku yakin belum pernah.

Tuhan memberiku duka, aku mnegeluh.
Datang tawa, tapi aku acuh.

Apa yang sanggup menyadarkanku?

Jika mulut boleh berkata, mungkin cinta bunda jawab hatiku.
Duka terdalam kehilangan sauh.
Sudah setahun berlalu, namun baru detik ini aku merasa butuh.

Perayaan terlewatkan jauh, namun tetap saja aku jenuh.
Tak ada yang berarti selain cinta ibu.
Rasa terima kasih terbelenggu.
Tak tersampaikan karena cepatnya waktumu berlalu.

Tuhan aku bersyukur Engkau telah membiarkanku melewati cobaan-cobaan berarti.
Merasakan perih yang pasti.
Tersenyum ikhlas karena pada akhirnya aku mengerti
Bahwa setelah rintik hujan akan tampak pelangi.

Dan untuk ibu ku ucap banyak syukur atas kesediaanmu mengandung tubuh mungilku.
Izinkan aku menangis mengenang jasa tak berbalasmu.
Walau dirimu tak hadir lagi, namun hatiku rindu.
Kehampaan yang kau tinggalkan mendesak napas.
Jejak kasih dan senyummu berbekas.
Kasihmu tanpa batas dan ikhlas.
Bait doa serta harap kurangkai untukmu.
Dengan nama seluruh sel penyusun tubuhku,
Ucap terima kasih kupersembahkan.

Common Denominator

Just a fraction of your love fills the air
And I fall in love with you
All over again, oh
You're the light that feeds the sun
In my world
I'd face a thousand years of pain for my girl
Out of all the things in life that i could fear
The only thing that would hurt me, uh
Is if you weren't here, oh

[Chorus:]
I don't wanna go back to just being one half of the equation
Do you understand what I'm sayin'?
Girl, without you I'm lost
Can't fix this compass at heart
Between me and love,
You're the common denominator
Oh, oh , oh, oh
Common denominator
Oh, yeah, whoa

Before your love was low
Playing girls was my high
You changed the game
Now I put my card to the side, ay
When broken hearts rise up to say, "Love is a lie"
You and I would stand to be love's reply, yeah

Out of all things in life that I could fear, yeah
The only thing that would hurt me is if you weren't here, whoa

[Chorus]

I can't imagine life without your touch,
And every kiss that you give,
You fill me up
And through all the heart achin'
Jealous females hatin'

I'm gonna hold it down for you
You, whoa, oh, whoa
You're the common denominator
Oh yeah whoa

I don't wanna to go back...

[Chorus]

Just a fraction of your love fills the air
And I fall in love with you all over again, yeah 

Beautiful december, how can i not remember you?

November 20th 2010
The date when he first text me up to asked my friend’s phone number and we began to text each other everyday and everynight.
I have felt something for him along long time ago when he first did not notice that i am exist around him.
It was just a simple fancy feeling but God changed it and that fancy feeling turned out to be more than fancy.
I FALL FOR HIM.
I fall for his act and his respect to the girls. I fall for his gentle attitude and his extreme act was just an additional reason to make me fall deeper.
I started to give more signal to him and see how he would react after that. I give him attention and he gave me his too.
He asked me out and i started to feel my feet were not on the ground.
We had fun but something made me think.
We went out as friends not more than that.
And it is addicting, i want it more.
There is no smooth and simple way in this kind of life.
One day i heard a bad news about his past (a romance flashback).
He has a bunch of exs, he has THIRTY exs !!!!
Can you imagine it????
But if you want to start a relationship, dont forget to trust each other first and i do trust him so i continued my attempt to be closer with him.
My surrounding realized that i have fallen for him and i considered that realization as a bad thing because if it had a horrible end, the one who would suffer is me.
So i asked my friend to keep silent about what they have heard.
Time goes by so fast and my attempt showed a progress.
We’ve been out three times and in the last chance he asked me to be his girlfriend.
12♥12♥10 is a special date to remember .

At first, i did not expect anything but apparently on my home he held my hand, my left hand :)
I wont forget how he put his fingers between the space in my fingers and how he smile at me.

Im his girlfriend now so i dont need to attract his attention at me. The only thing that i should do now is to keep him beside me.

Bukan Kasih Hanya Kawan

Tak setenang dulu aku berpikir.

Tak seikhlas dulu aku tertawa

Dan...

Tak sesedih seperti dulu ketika aku berduka.

Maksud hati menghindari tapi tak disangka kau kembali.

Bukan dia tapi anda.

Bukan aku tapi saya.

Bukan apa-apa tapi suka.

Sadar diri aku dihadapmu.

Bukan kasih hanya kawan.

Tak berani aku berlebihan.

Dari kejauhan kau tampak bagai baja.

Namun baris kalimatmu sehalus sutra.

Apa maksudmu?

Jangan todong aku jika kalimatmu bagai candu.

Maksud hati ingin henti tapi kau bagai hantu.

Kau terbangkan aku tanpa sayap.

Buatku tertawa hingga meluap.

Lalu tak lama...

Kau jatuhkan aku  secepat kilat.

Membuat dadaku termegap-megap.

Air mata tampak mengilat.

Apa maksudmu?